I have become my very own science experiment. I decided to document my opks this cycle to try to figure out what the heck is going on with these 50 day+ cycles. I wonder if these long cycles are normal after a loss? Is it my body trying to balance itself out? Is something wrong with me? Do women have healthy pregnancies from ultra long cycles?
First lets look at the evidence.
Method:
I read somewhere that you're not supposed to use FMU for opks, and you should hold it in for at least 4 hours, so I started taking them around noon or as long as I could hold it.
Data:
On Wednesday Feb 16th(cd27) my digital opk was finally & clearly a positive. I don't think there is much room for error on a digital. Signs at the time, all pointed to ovulation approaching.
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| Feb 16th |
Nearly a week later, on Tuesday Feb 22nd(cd33), I saw a second line on the opk. (It did not match the control line so was not indicative of a positive. The non-digital opks are much harder to interpret as you can see.) The next day, Feb 23rd, I again saw a lighter second line. By Feb 24th, the line had all but disappeared, leaving me to wonder if perhaps those were the closest to positive as I was going to see on a non-digital.
(My apologies for the poor photo quality, some were taken on an iphone3.)
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| Feb 22nd(cd33) noon - almost? |
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| Feb 23rd(cd34) noon |
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| Feb 24th(cd35) 6pm - clearly neg |
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| Positive? or Almost? |
Inconclusive. I'm still left wondering and waiting. Perhaps this is positive or perhaps it is coming along soon, either way we'll be taking advantage of it just in case. Now I'm kicking myself that I didn't think to pop a digital opk just to confirm. Also scared that if I took a digital later today it would dash my hopes and read neg. So I'll err on the side of positivity and treat this as if it were a +opk and see what happens from here.
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| FF chart Jan 21-Feb 26th |
I wonder if these long cycles are normal after a loss?
I've heard everything from women who's cycles are back to normal first month after, to women who have to wait a year or two to get their cycles back in order. Those women are saints. I have no clue how they can wait so long, hoping and praying for a pregnancy without going completely bonkers. I send them all light and love for being such champs.
Is it my body trying to balance itself out?
I hope so. I'd love to have my 35 day cycles back please. I know I cursed them as being too long, but I now appreciate them wholeheartedly. Please come back?
Is something wrong with me?
I'm guessing the answer to this is a big fat no, but I'm also guessing it's natural to worry, especially when your doctor won't even test you after almost a year of trying with very odd cycles. Also reading all the horror stories online doesn't help at all! I need to stop reading.
Do women have healthy pregnancies from ultra long cycles?
I searched the chart gallery on fertilityfriend and came up with the answer of yes. Soem women had really ultra late (even cd70+) ovulations and went on to get a +hpt. I can only hope that those pregnancies were happy and healthy with beautiful healthy babies at the end.
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The Spirituality side of my coin.
I believe that there is a higher force in the universe which can grant our dreams if we work hard enough to attain them. Without going into a debate, or too much detail, I am faithful that the universe will provide.
Tonight I am attending a Tarot event at a friends place. The invitation spoke of Tarot readings, group healing, Yuen, energy work, and coaching, along with meditation and relaxation. I'm excited to see what my reading might say, what I can learn and to just be at peace, relax and take it all in with an open heart.
I'm bringing mini (baby) cupcakes (to go along with my positive energy for pregnancy and a future baby). Can't wait!!
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