So Far, So Good.

There's a lot going on right now and even more things swimming around in my head.

I'm now on cd8..or cd7. I couldn't tell when you begin cd1 as I don't truely know the difference between spotting and a light AF. I even tried to search google for an answer. It seems that it is so vague that no one else knows the difference either. So I'm counting red as light AF and going to stick with that approach. This would mean that last cycle was only a 10 day LP again, which isn't so great, but this time, I've got a prescription for progesterone which I'll begin taking for 9 days in the LP. I'm fearful that 9 days is not nearly enough, as I know that to sustain a pregnancy (I know I am jumping ahead of myself here) you need to take progesterone until after 12 weeks along. I guess that is just one more battle that I'll need to prepare for, should the day come that I need to fight it.

Either way, today is day 4 of 5 on 50mg clomid. I have been taking it at night between 8-10pm as I'd read that it can give you hot flashes. I've been noticing that I am waking up in the middle of the night and am quite hot. I kick off the covers and go back to sleep. Then I wake up cold sometime later, pull on the covers and go back to sleep again. It seems to be about once per night. Not so bad. I can handle this minor side effect.

I am hoping that this 50mg dosage will help to O on a "normal" cycle schedule, with a healthy egg, thus giving us the best chances of success. This, in comibnation with metformin, has been toted as good for those with PCOS who are TTC. I will begin OPKs this week sometime as well and follow through until they turn positive, however long that may take. I keep trying to visualize the clomid working to block receptors and cause my body to think it is time to ovulate.

I look forward to receiving the package in the mail from the fertility clinic. I'm speculating that it will be full of things to read and forms to fill out. (Weird fact about me - I love filling out forms!) Our appointment is only 16 days away. It can't come soon enough.

I imagine that the specialist (Dr. Greene is his name) will just be doing an initial consultation and that months of testing may ensue, but at least we are seeming to get somewhere. I'm trying to prepare myself for the worst and hope for the best as per my usual tactics for stressful situations.

I've got an open mind and an open heart. I'm crossing my fingers and praying for something wonderful.

Just like everything else in this TTC business... Only time will tell.

Another Brick in the Wall

Well, the latest update is that AF showed up after 10-11dpo on about cd87. I know, not ideal, but on the bright side, at least something is happening.

It was quite a long ride, which I hope to not have to endure ever again. I think possibly the metformin did add an extra day to my LP, which is still somewhat short for my liking.

So far metformin hasn't given me any noticeable negative side effects. It has seemed to have reined in my BBTs somewhat. I look forward to seeing even greater positive changes on the medication over time.

Overall It was a confusing cycle and I'm now counting today as cd5. Which is important...

The walk-in clinic doctor prescribed clomid for me this week! I'm excited that with any luck, I'll be able to ovulate on a normal time frame this month. Avoiding any more super long cycles. I'm on 50mg per day for days 5-9.

Please send positive vibes this way for a healthy cycle. I know our LO is coming sometime soon and who knows, this may just be our key. I'm willing to try most anything to just have normal cycles and more importantly, a normal pregnancy.

At the same time I'm also somewhat nervous of the clomid due to the side effects, which I understand are rare but still it's a risk at some level. Clomid can cause existing cysts to grow, so I certainly hope that the cyst that was found on my right ovary in March has gone away. The doctor didn't do a follow up ultrasound, so until we get tests at the fertility clinic, we won't knowing more.

I'm going forward on faith that all will be just fine. This is another step, another test, another proactive movement, towards our future family.

The Call

This afternoon, as we were getting ready to head back to the walk-in clinic for my "cd21" blood test results, the phone rang.

It was Jennifer from the local fertility clinic! (I'm beginning to like her.) She had informed me back in March, that it would likely be 3-6 more months to receive a phone call. My expectations had been for the worst, and I'd prepared myself to wait it out until the fall. Today she called to make our first appointment! I still can't believe it. She is sending us out a package full of information.

On May 11th, we will be going to the fertility clinic for help with TTC and end of June is the SA. It feels so wonderful to know that by May/June we will have a plan. We will finally know for sure if I do have PCOS and we'll be on track to get thorough testing completed. Wish us luck for a healthy, workable outcome!

Ideally, we could conceive on our own, but given the past year, it would appear I am not ovulating properly/in a timely fashion(attributed to PCOS), and in order to have a healthy baby we will take all of the help we can get. We are doing our best to be proactive. Some of our stress has just been lifted.

Currently, we are in the walk-in clinic waiting room to get my cd21/7dpo progesterone test results. I'm hopeful for a number above 10ng/ml, which I've read online is ideal.
"A level over 5 probably indicates some form of ovulation, but most doctors want to see a level over 10 on a natural cycle, and a level over 15 on a medicated cycle."

Update: My progesterone levels were found to be 11.8mmol
I guess they use a different measurement in Canada. So I don't know what the conversion would be.

The doctor wanted to see it at 13-108, so he said I may not be ovulating on my own and recommended I wait and get clomid at the fertility clinic. Luckily that should be within the next couple of months.

Progesterone Draw

I returned to the walk in clinic a few nights ago after the gym. I'd had a "feeling" for a few days that I should go in to ask for another blood draw, this time for progesterone being that I believe I am finally in the second half of my cycle. (It only took 77 days!)



I walked out of the clinic holding in my hand a happy golden form with little tick marks on the precise boxes I'd hoped for. Excitement does not begin to describe the feeling, of knowing that you are going to be able to rule out issues and know you are healthy, or at the very least know what to do if anything doesn't line up perfectly. I am being proactive. I have a plan! (Okay, so maybe this is also my way of controlling the uncontrollable by ruling things out.) it's my body ad I have a right to know what is going on. Besides, I like charts and statistics.

Fast forward a few days. I am now sitting in the waiting room of the blood lab and waiting to "donate" five more vials of blood for testing purposes. They're looking ah FSH, LH, estrogen (all of which would be from the follicular phase so not relevant currently but hey I'm no doctor) and lastly progesterone! The hormone which regulates the second half of your cycle, causes your temperature to rise and sustains a pregnancy until about week 10 when the placenta takes over. So this is why it is very important to have the correct levels.

Fingers crossed that I'm all good. Or even better that there's a tiny spark within.

Positive Movement

We continue to wait for the phone call from the fertility clinic. Last we heard, they had indicated that we may expect a call within 3-6 months. That would put us at approximately June-September for a start date. They call and then arrange an initial appointment for a few weeks after that. My hope is that the herbs or the metformin will help in the meantime and we won't even need to see them. I'm now taking 1500mg per day of the metformin and I've noticed what appears to be a stabilization of my BBTs. I'm taking that as a positive sign.

Also this past week the lines on the opks started getting darker and then faded away again. The next few days temperatures will tell if that was ovulation or just another false reading from the PCO. My fingers are crossed that I was successful this time around, and that I am on the right track. I'm not sure how much longer I can endure this cycle. My plan B is to go back to the walk-in clinic end of April and work with Provera/Clomid from there.

I'm also exercising more and going to the gym twice a week. I am back seeing my personal trainer and hoping to lose a few pounds as I wait. Plus I've read that PCO can sometimes be brought under control by exercise and weight loss. So it can't hurt to try. I also recently joined a yoga studio and am going twice a week at lunch hours.

This past Thursday was my last day (for the next twenty-four months) as a City Planner. Monday leads to my first day as an Applications Analyst. I have some big changes to look forward to and am trying not to be nervous, but it's difficult to be the new person. I'm hopeful that the new job will reduce my stress levels and help in some small way with TTC. I also look forward to the new challenges and learning. On top of that, I am also preparing for my final exam on April 19th for my Professional Planning designation to become an RPP, MCIP. I have been working towards this for the past 4 years.

Right now a BFP would be very welcome. In some small way I think it could diffuse my worries about these things and cause me to relax knowing that no matter what happens, that there are bigger things for me. Plus having something so very precious to focus on would be elating. Fingers crossed that my BBTs continue on an upward path from here.